I head out
To lose myself
From the places
Trying to define me
But instead of
Wandering lost
I find another layer
Of who I am

Travelling out
Only to look inward
A collage of new features
Noses and lips drawn differently
Cheeks wider and rounder
But their eyes
Always the same
Entry ways, beckoning

I ask
If they can see the
Same opening
In my expression
Do I grant them
The same passage?
And they say,
"We see you, child
And what you are trying to be

"We will always lead
You inward
Until you see
Who you already are
The complexity
Of your purpose
As you turn it
Into simplicity.

"And then
We will be able to walk in
Into your gaze
And into the light of your soul
To remind you again and again
Of reality
Where it now masquerades and lingers
In your dreams"

Knot-hole eyes
Observe the challenge
Of my gait
Shuffling by in attempt
To find sure steps
For a sure path

I lean against
Their sturdy trunks
When I need stillness
To discern
What ground to claim
For each foothold

Under the motion
Of wind dancing leaves
I ponder the soil
A choice will leave undisturbed
Knowing that it never approaches
Right or wrong

But rather it is a measure of time
Delineated by each possibility
Of each step I could take
The span needed for lessons
People and places
Entering, meeting, leaving, knowing

My hands meet bark
Chilled by shade
And new grass
Fills in around my toes
These beings have
Seen and felt so much of me

I push off
Giving faith
To the depth of roots
And sturdiness of presence
Deflecting me into
Direction

I hear the gentle voice
Reflecting into me
As light waves are absorbed
By each leaf
“A deep breath our wandering start,
You are growing even when direction is indiscernible”

I’m going
To where the sweet earth
Accepts my bare feet
Where older ways
Are still the main ways
And time is thought of in circles
I feel the call towards
These slower inclinations
Where I will replace
Stale notions of the world
With vibrant memories
Once forgotten by idleness

These travels are waiting
To be fulfilled
Pending on my ability here
To find a pace slow enough
To be aware of the guides
Directing me to the calm
Needed first
The wholeness of trust
Before embarking
Settling the unknowns
In a place where they can instead
Be marveled

Family adventures

Happy New Year to all!

My goals:

Find a studio space

Paint, paint, paint

Run and train for the Chuckanut Foot Race, Ski to Sea, and a half marathon

Find a team for Ski to Sea!

Save up mahoola for a trip to Peru

Start grad school next fall

Hike and camp as often as possible

Read and write!

Cross country ski, and snowshoe 

Learn to downhill ski

Keep learning guitar and piano

Go on night time photography adventures

Invest in an old film slr

Study Spanish every day!

Practice yoga in the morning

Stay open for all learning experiences

Love and joy